Friday, April 24, 2015

Women complain men don't want to marry


First impression, I am interested to write about this article because my oft repeated point about marriage is that it has little to do with love. Good for you if you are among the exceptions but by and large marriage is about dollars and sense (cents too). Not in this article but children used to be about pensions too.

I didn't read more than 20% of the article. There is no need to do that now, may be forever.

But marriage that is based on making calculations is a big a loser as blind faith. One don't get married and eventually suffer the consequences of their short sightedness when they grow old; the other produced a brood and get stuck in a vicious cycle of poverty and want. British society is polarizing into both ends eh? Here we are doing better but I am not sure for how long. We are imbibing external values unaware. If we adapt them constructively for our use well and good.

I think our problem is we calculate too much, i.e., too much sight and too little faith. The problem shows itself as delayed marriages and no kids. It might eventually and may already have lead to no marriage as well. For faith is something policy makers have no blinking idea of and rationality is the only strategy they bring to solve all problems.

Whether people are conscious of Keynes oft quoted and misused remark that, "in the long run we are all dead", fewer and fewer people are going to entertain marriage and having children by just working off Excel models. Those who do must decide to throw away those spreadsheet models and go with their heart. I love kids damn what the numbers say would be a good starting point if very risky one. To be practical and that is also absolutely true which I had been wrongly taught from my days in church: A wife is meant more to be loved than as a partner or helpmate. Of course again to be practical find someone that is easier to love. Exceed your faith to our peril. God have mercy on you!






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