Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Who Chua Wen Hu left behind


Saw this reported across the media yesterday. I thought what a pity and also so reckless, only 26 years old. I wonder how the parents feel.

Then I saw this in this morning papers and I was angry with the dead fellow. How irresponsible, father is not mentioned and let behind a fiancee and a grieving mother. Notice the curious mix of surnames too. Probably a complicated family. Do not be so quick to judge as we do not know the background. Nevertheless a tragedy.

Singapore Casket is about the most expensive place to have a funeral too.



Update: March 23 10:25 am

Didn't read closely but kinda of read there were some unhappiness from the comments. I think this new obit would make things better without detracting from the message. My oversight, should have done this in the first place!

15 comments:

  1. His father passed away

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    Replies
    1. This is very sad but usually obits have a line for that with (deceased). I didn't know what to think of it and kept an open mind.

      This is just the sort of life for some. Not fair to the fiancee Dawn Tan

      Delete
  2. It was reported in the papers that he has a step brother. Apparently you don't do your homework. How far people will go to for more page views. Why not start an obituary blog where you scan obituaries for skeletons in a dead men's closet? Great idea ain't it? Give the dead a break man.

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    Replies
    1. Not interested to attract readers. This blog is named blogging for myself.

      Delete
    2. Why not just have a diary or private account then. Joker

      Delete
    3. I have explained why months ago and I don't want to do so again. Regular readers know where I am coming from.

      Delete
  3. PengYou expressed himself right. It is sad to see someone die young. But ending one's life in circumstances where drugs (and in various increasingly dangerous driving incidents, probably under liquor influence or whatever) are involved is concerning. It calls to question also about responsible parenting. I don't see PengYou's intent is to push for any detailed obituary but rather, he rightly has in a sense acknowledged life is precious and that is now taken so lightly given the world is engulfed with death culture and short-termism (get it over and move on)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, you have read me correctly. Very often I find myself not just blogging for myself but the kids too.

      Delete
  4. We as parents should not abdicate our responsibilities to "inform" our kids. We may not be totally right but we learn along the way. Better than not doing anything and then regret over the consequences. The spirit driving the blog is noble - we share, we learn and we improve.

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  5. Would mentioning the high cost of having it at casket and the fact that there was a weird combination of surnames be really noble in this case. I wonder.

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  6. Personally I think using this example is logical. Just don't think that irrelevant comments about the family were necessary. Somehow it seems the post was written to stereotype the deceased ' s family background and his actions rather then anything else.

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  7. "Notice the curious mix of surnames too. Probably a complicated family."

    I was dumbfounded after reading your sentences. You had showed your judgement from the sentences above yet you add in "Do not be so quick to judge as we do not know the background."

    What a shallow contradiction indeed.

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  8. You are insanely rude and disgustingly have no respect for the deceased and those who are close to him.

    What on earth is your objective to blog about this? Imagine that if it was your brother or fiance that passed on? how would you feel if you came across a stranger who blogged about the deceased the way that you did, your insensitive thoughts, assumption and judgements on the deceased.

    I hope you will take this post down, he will not be remembered by your judgements on his family and him.

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  9. Sunday morning is a good time to restore some peace and serenity among the community on this blog.
    I strongly sympathise with Aly and others who hold the view that PengYou should be more sensitive to how others may read into what is written. Indeed words can cut more than the sword.
    Reading into the original post, I sensed Peng You's immediate reaction might be that parents can and should do more in today's society to caution their children from engaging in activities that may open up to danger - the recent KL music festival was reported to have open drug peddling and usage. Under the influence of drugs (and alcohol), things can easily go out of hand. When a life especially a young one is lost, that can be very hurting. Probably PengYi felt that strongly. I would add, we need to remind ourselves to always respond not just from the mind, but from the heart
    The blog has been a good place to share news and opinions. The spirit, as I earlier indicated, is noble in the sense we share, we learn, we improve. But let's do it in a cordial and peer-respecting way.

    As it is accessible to all who stumble into it, may I suggest PengYi puts a lock so only those who abide by that spirit can participate.

    As matured people, let's correct each other in good spirit and in brotherly/sisterly fashion.

    We grow together along the way.

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  10. your blog post reeks of self righteousness, and your speculation on his background is extremely offensive. it is sad enough that he passed away; if you really gave a damn about the people he left behind, then you wouldn't be blogging about this in such a cavalier manner. there is nothing informative or educational about your commentary on his family and the cost of having a funeral at singapore casket. you make me sick.

    ReplyDelete